I’m aware it’s a touchy subject so how do I tell her dieting is making her fat! Anon.
Dear Anon, next time she talks about her diet (and she will), tell her you are proud of her for trying hard to lose weight, but suggest a general MOT from her GP might uncover an underlying issue (perhaps she is menopausal), and take it from there.
The rate of dieting failure is high, which your wife has proven, so now it’s time to change her long-term habit and opt for life-changing ways to improve her diet and wellbeing.
The cuddly comfortable couch potato lifestyle many couples fall into needs to change.
It’s always easier doing activities with someone else, so as a couple, start walking, swimming or dancing, anything that you enjoy, and take turns at cooking each other low calorie healthy meals.
You will benefit greatly too, so get started. I’m sure you’ll smash it.
Dear Janice, my parents generously want to pay for the family to spend Christmas together at a beautiful six-bedroom country lodge.
The kids would absolutely love it, but our extended family don’t get on.
My husband despises my brother-in-law who barely says a civil word to my sister.
My older sister is single and appears oblivious to her unruly, rude and very loud children.
My cousin and his partner don’t join in with any chat and bury their heads in their phones.
To top it all, my aunt and uncle are alcoholics and could start an argument in an empty house!
My parents are paying for this as a special Christmas treat, therefore, I don’t want to say I can’t go, but I’m anxious already and it’s only August!
What do you suggest? Jen.
Dear Jen, would you put a cat, dog, budgie and hamster in one room for four days and expect all would be well? No, so before fur and feathers fly, you need to get together and make decisions.
Agree who will be in which bedroom (on arrival, this will be the first disagreement). Decide who is in charge of the itinerary, food, drink, cooking, cleaning and are you all exchanging gifts?
All families disagree, but the level you take it to and how you conduct yourself is what matters.
As for the alcoholics, play that one by ear. If they misbehave, then together take a stance and point out that they are ruining everyone’s Christmas celebrations.
I could suggest you simply pull out of this break away, but remember, your parents want this to happen so agree to put aside your differences for a few days.
After all, as a family this may well be the last opportunity your parents have to enjoy a big family Christmas.
Got a question for our agony aunt? Email askjanice@glasgowtimes.co.uk
